From Kyle -- Welcome to my blog. I hope my stories bring a smile to your face.

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Many of you have wondered what I’ve been up to lately. I’ve been playing my cards close to my chest and supplied only generic updates when asked. It’s now time for me to share more detail.

I bought a house.

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Today, I said goodbye to my cat, Winston. This blog will serve as his epitaph.

Winston came to us through a co-worker of Tanisha’s. He was found at the beach, wandering around a dumpster, with no mama. A tiny floof of a thing, barely six weeks old. He had medium length, chocolate colored fur, with these long, white-tips, and clear green eyes. He really was quite adorable.

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Last week I was in Las Vegas, visiting my sister and her family. While there, my sister invited me to her yoga class. I agreed to go. Now, y’all know me—I’m not the most serious person…but I TRIED to take this class seriously. It’s important to my sister and I don’t want to ruin it for her. I’m not going to sugar-coat this—I’m not good at yoga. I’m extremely inflexible. I have very tight hamstrings…and pretty much everything else is tight, too. Before I arrived in Vegas, my sister suggested that I go on a date with the yoga instructor. “Hey, when you come out here…you should go out with my yoga instructor. She’s really nice, and really pretty.” Truth be told, I wasn’t immediately sold on the idea. I’m really not a fan of blind dates. People are wonderful—but blinded by their own emotions.

 
Friend: “OMG! My friend is so awesome! You two would get along great. You should definitely go out with so-and-so! It’d be sooo cool! We could double date!”
Me: “Oh yeah? Well tell me about this friend.”
Friend: “Her name is Hog-face McGoo. She’s from Slagthorn, so her face is 90% razor-sharp teeth. But…oh, my gosh, her eyes! They are sooo…beady and jet black. When she looks at you, it’s absolutely terrifying. She has a GREAT personality. It’s very…there’s a Slagthorn term for it that loosely translates to: wet-blanket. Also, she loves to travel and laugh. I’ve known her for years!”
Me: “Uh…thanks?”

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Once upon a time there lived a couple. They were a happy couple. A man of fair hair and blue eyes, and his wife, with hair black as pitch and skin dark as chocolate. They lived in a wonderful cottage in the Northern Hills of the Kingdom of Ra-Lee.

“Husband…my Horizon EyeSprite is having trouble connecting to the FruitVine. Would you be a dear and look into that for me?” asked the wife.

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I recently watched a couple of TED talks. I like some of the presentations…some of them. Not all of them are good. In fact, I think some of the presentations are down right silly. There was one guy who did a talk on how to tie your shoe. Seriously, that was a talk. He tried to convince people that they were tying their shoes the wrong way, and then spent twenty minutes showing them the “right” way to tie your shoe. There are many ways to tie your shoe. If your shoe keeps coming un-tied, how about you be an adult and look up alternative knots. Or, if that is too much trouble, wear loafers for the rest of your life. Another guy did an entire talk on Yo-yoing. Yup. That’s right. I said, Yo-yoing. How is that helpful to anyone? “Looking for a life skill that can’t be taught? Try a Yo-yo…and then stick to it for ten years and learn advanced tricks. BAM! Your life has changed. You are now ten years older, and living alone!” Two other TED talks I saw really just seemed like self-promotions for Vegas shows. One guy was a pickpocket. He spent twenty minutes stealing from a volunteer on stage. His act was supposed to teach people about misdirection. I think we’ve all seen at least one magic trick in our lives. I didn’t need him to spend time on stage showing me how easy it was to steal a man’s watch and wallet. The last guy I want to mention did card tricks. Again, this really seemed like self-promotion for a show. Thirty minutes of card tricks. How does that improve my life? He didn’t even show us how to do a card trick. If he showed the audience HOW to do a trick, that would have been something. I could practice that and amaze complete strangers at a party that I probably will never get invited to because someone will know I will do a card trick.

Okay, so on to my TED talk. If I was asked to give a talk, I would present on appreciating truly amazing work. Think about that for just a moment. What IS truly amazing work? I’m going to give you some examples.

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